Love Forbidden from the Beginning
by MurasakiShiori
Summary: Inoue planned to get together with Ichigo, but somebody was faster than her. Inoue's melancholic, sentimental thoughts  written in Inoue Orihime's point of view , about her feelings at a meeting with her friends.
1. Chapter 1

_**Welcome to my fanfiction!**_

_**This is a short story about how I felt at a certain point in my life. And I used up Inoue to tell you my thoughts and I switched my loved man with Ichigo. It is about a desperate, impossible love. I hope you are going to read this and like it! Please, even if you didn't find this story to your liking, review, so I can improve! Thank you very much! Also, tell me please about grammar problems or typos! Thanks!**_

_**Have fun reading!**_

_INOUE POV_

It was not my fault. Anybody would fall in love with him. Besides, I made a promise that day. Well, it wasn't really a promise. But I said if Kuchiki-san fell in love with him, I would, too.

We were all sitting by those candles' light. He was playing the guitar, and it was perfect. A little slow, a little sad, a little romantic – that is what set the mood. Everybody was smiling, even Sado-san. My gaze turned to his perfectly shaped face. A big smile formed on his slim face, he seemed truly happy. He laughed a little as he made a mistake while playing the music. He noticed that I was looking at him. I tried to look away quickly, but he managed to look into my eyes before I could turn away. The candles didn't give much light – his pupils grew bigger than usual. It gave him a really cute look. He either didn't notice it, or didn't want to notice the special look I gave him and how I was almost stalking him. He only gave me a simple, but heart-warming smile and turned to the group of people around the little table again.

I shouldn't be feeling this way. I can barely keep myself from going up to him and kiss his cheek. I want to feel it so badly. But this love was forbidden from the start. I hung my head and looked at my lap. I was working so hard so that he would notice me one day. And he actually did notice me. When I was in trouble he saved me, when I was sad he cheered me up, and when I was alone he was there for me. Who wouldn't fall in love with him after all we went through?

But somebody was faster than me. Somebody was quicker and snatched him away from my hands. I felt my throat get narrow and I have to get a deep breath. I exhaled it shakily. A smile unintentionally grew onto my face. I'm so miserable. Why couldn't I get these feelings for someone else? Why him? My vision got blurry and I felt tears coming. I had to keep them back. No matter what, I couldn't cry now. They care for me and they would want to know the reason. And I don't want to lie. Not anymore. I looked up at the ceiling and with a lot of effort I managed to push them back.

I looked back to the people around us then at the guitar in his lap. His fingers gently plucked the strings. The golden ring on his finger reflected some light from the dying light of the candles. The song came to an end and everyone clapped their hands together, giving a big applause to the musician. He took a last look at me before bowing and laughing. Why did he look at me? Why? Because I am more than a friend? Because I am ugly and he wants to show how pathetic I am? Why?

Kuchiki-san got up and sat next to him. She placed an arm around his shoulders, but he threw it off. He placed the guitar on the floor and turned to her, giving a kiss onto her lips. I don't know who it was that started the applause, but as I looked around I felt disappointed. Even Keigo-san applauded, despite his love for Kuchiki-san. Of course – I am the only one. I am not angry. Nor jealous. Just sad. I put my elbow on the arm of the chair and rested my head on it. He softly poked my shoulder and I looked at him immediately, ready for everything. „What's wrong?" He asked simply, yet it was so good to hear. At least he cared for me. But it was the worst he could do as well. I fell in love with him again. „Just a little tired." I lied with an innocent smile and faked a yawn. His face showed relief as he nodded, then turned back to Kuchiki-san. His light-orange hair reflected the light of the last candles as he turned back.

I reached out for some more apple juice. I had to do something to get him off my mind.

_**Please don't forget to review! Thank you!**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**Love Forbidden From the Beginning**_

_**Chapter 2.**_

_INOUE POV_

I looked at the small stadium in front of me. I let out a slightly shaking breath and looked at Tatsuki-chan. She gave me a comforting and reassuring smile and we stepped inside. I'm not really used to such big crowds, and places like this, but Tatsuki-chan kind of begged me to come. Kurosaki-kun doesn't often go to concerts either… it was Kuchiki-san who brought him here...

We started looking for our friends among the big sea of people. I easily spotted out Kurosaki-kun's soft, orange hair. He was rubbing his fingers against his temple as the frown on his face deepened… that is so like him. I know every movement of his. I know what he is thinking of. I soon noticed Kuchiki-san, but surprisingly, she wasn't next to Kurosaki-kun. Michiru-chan was standing between them. She was looking really gorgeous. I think she put on some make-up. It really makes her beautiful. Oh how I wish I could be beautiful like her…!

Tatsuki-chan took me by the arm and started dragging us in their direction in the crowd. If she wouldn't had held my arm I surely would have gotten lost! I got a glimpse of Ishida-san, Sado-san, Asano-san and Kojima-san. I didn't know they came as well, but I was glad. When I turned around to tell this Tatsuki-chan, we were already in front of Kurosaki-kun and Kuchiki-san. A blush crept onto my face and I felt my face get hotter. I nervously greeted them and started fondling with the end of my blouse. Kurosaki-kun was really nice, he looked really happy that we found them, and he was smiling. He rarely smiles, but when he does, it's really worth it. I wish I could see it all the time. I wish I could wake up every morning to be greeted by his happy face. But before I could start a conversation, the stadium got all silent suddenly and we looked around to see what happened. The band walked up on the stage and they announced they are starting. The crowd applauded and got really loud. I couldn't help wincing a bit, but all in all, I was feeling alright.

After half an hour I kind of realized why I don't really go to places like this. I got tired and sweaty real soon. I tied my hair into a ponytail. But it was still not enough. I tried to tell Tatsuki-chan I am going out for some fresh air, but she didn't really hear it. After some non-verbal communication, she understood but told me to go alone. I inhaled the quite cold, but fresh air outside and felt relief. After a few seconds I turned around to go back, but Kurosaki-kun came out. His cheeks were tinted a bit rosy, he looked like he wasn't freezing either. I smiled as I took a step back. It would have been rude to go back, wouldn't it? He asked how I was. Without thinking I told the first thing that came to my mind to this question: „I'm fine, thanks. And you?" He started ranting about the crowd inside and how awful it was there. But he said he was actually enjoying himself despite those things. I nodded, and all the while I was thinking on topics and subjects we could talk about. We are finally alone, just the two of us, I can not afford to let him leave, to make him think I'm boring. I tried to tell some jokes as well, but I couldn't really make him laugh out loud. He only chuckled quietly, but I was already satisfied with that. I was kind of starting to feel cold so I asked if he was coming back, or staying outside. He chose to come with me and I smiled. Maybe I still have a chance.

It was so nice of him to come outside after me. I knew he came because of that, I noticed him seeing me as I made my way towards the exit. He actually followed me outside. He surely understood how lonely I was here. Isn't that sweet? I always loved Kurosaki-kun for that. Even when all our friends were there, and somebody got alone, he would go and cheer up that person. If he had other stuff to do, and was real busy, he stopped and helped others. I wonder how come the others didn't fell in love with him. And I wonder how come Kuchiki-san fell in love with him. She was acting so grumpy towards him almost every time I saw them. I thought she was looking down on him. And when my friends asked if she was in love with Kurosaki-kun, she didn't say yes. She was actually surprised by the question… maybe that is the reason why she started thinking about it, and it made her believe she was in love with him? …Sigh... Why couldn't I be the faster one?...

We stepped inside and I smelled the sweaty hotness of the stadium again. He turned to me. „Hey, by the way, have you seen Rukia?" I tried my best not to pout. I felt like my heart pounded painfully. My chest started shrinking and I felt my facial expression was really hard to control, so I said as quick I could. „No, I haven't seen Kuchiki-san for a while now." Yes. I managed to say it without any sadness on my face. I turned away quickly, like I was looking for something to hide my sadness. I could barely hear, but Kurosaki-kun said something about finding her. Good for him.

We made our ways towards our friends among the dancing and screaming crowd and got further and further from each other. I tried to follow Kurosaki-kun, but he wasn't really looking back at me. Actually, it's even possible that he simply forgot about me. I saw Tatsuki-san as she turned around and looked for us, scanning the place with her eyes. When she saw me, she let out a sigh and looked at me with quite angry eyes. I remembered what she told me last time. That the reason I lost to Kuchiki-san was because I was too shy and would never start a conversation with Kurosaki-kun. If only she saw us outside…! I was brilliant! Well, not really, but compared to myself…

Anyways, I opened my mouth. „So, where is Kuchiki-san?" I asked, turning back, but I only saw the leaving figure of Kurosaki-kun. He simply left me without a word. Maybe he thought we were already seperate when we came back. My throat clenched and for a moment I thought I'd break out in crying. He left me like that... I thought this moment was special and it helped me to get closer to him. But after all, it meant nothing to Kurosaki-kun.

I looked at the floor and the world around me darkened. I was still completely conscious, just dumbfounded and depressed. My brain stopped and I couldn't really think of much, only the sorrow inside. Why was I feeling like this? Why do I always get my hopes up? I am so overreacting it…but I can't help it. I was pulled back from my pitchblack dream by Tatsuki-chan's arm around my shoulders. I gave her a grateful smile, and a teardrop rolled down my cheek. I quickly tried to stop my crying. I was supposed to have fun here, and I couldn't let anyone see me like this.

I stayed inside for a while, but no matter how badly I didn't want to go outside again, I was almost on the brink of fainting, so Tatsuki-chan actually sent me out. She told me she'd come with me, but I said it was alright. The crowd was somewhat smaller now - I wonder if that was because of the lack of oxygen inside or because they didn't like this kind of music. I sadly blinked as I made my way outside, somehow my gaze stopping on Kurosaki-kun. I quickly looked away before I could get my hopes up again. But then I regretted averting my eyes - I mean, that is so rude! So I glanced back, hoping he still was there and didn't get offended. He smiled big and waved to me. I quickly smiled as well, and he disappeared in the crowd.

I was totally confused. Why was he waving to me so happily? Did I miss something? But I won't let hope take over me this time. I will show my confidence to everyone. After a short breather I returned and actually enjoyed the whole night. I'm really grateful to Tatsuki-chan, because she was there for me, and helped me to forget about Kurosaki-kun. My eyes often met them accidentally, and they were always doing something funny. But before I could get envious, Tatsuki-chan cheered me up. I'm grateful to have a wonderful friend like her.

_**So, how did you like it? I didn't really plan on making this story longer than 1 chapter, but I earned more experience.  
Sorry that this story isn't so melancholic, but more like „going in then out then in then out" (that sounded … ) but I couldn't really put**__** the happenings**__** together**__** any **__**better **_

_**I feel like I'm going to continue… with somebody else's POV and then Inoue's more hope. Trying not to spoil it all, but it's gonna be happy-end…probably…**_

_**Please, review!**_

_**ALSO**_

_**I would like to thank you guys ALL for reviewing so quickly my story! I didn't expect it to be so „popular"! I'm really, really grateful, and it makes me feel really good! Thank you very much!**_

_**Please, if you have some time, take a look at my other, new fanfictions. They don't sound so good, and they are not melancholic (some are), but I think it's worth a little look, I'm really anxious about how you like it!**_

_**THANK YOU VERY MUCH!**_

_***G**__**ives everyone free muffins, unicorns and hugs, decide which one you'd like ;D**__*****_


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